The best advice someone gave me for the first few weeks with a newborn was simple: Survive. Forget about all of your expectations. Your goal — your only goal — is to keep your baby alive and you and your partner sane. That's it. It's going to be hard and there's nothing you can do…
Continue reading ➞ The First Four Months: Confessions of a Reluctant Parent
Every year on our wedding anniversary, I write an article documenting the discoveries we’ve made in the past year about our relationship and each other. I’ve written six of these articles thus far, and with the seventh, I decided to try something a little different. Instead of grouping the article into pre-determined categories, I opened…
We found ourselves in Iceland on our sixth wedding anniversary. It was our first "big" vacation in four years. Between moving to Colorado, buying a house, renovating said house, changing jobs, and the ongoing effects of the COVID-19 pandemic, international travel just wasn't in the cards (or, to be honest, the budget). However, at the…
The lead-up to our wedding day felt appropriately chaotic. Two days before we were slated to tie the knot, a "once-in-a-century" storm blew in and flooded the quaint forest wedding venue we had chosen to get married at before we were even engaged. The rain fell in thick torrents all day, submerging streets and burying…
Continue reading ➞ Reflections On Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After Five Years of Marriage
Moved from Texas to Colorado.Started a new job.Purchased our first home.Global pandemic. If I could sum up our fourth year of marriage in one word, I'd undoubtedly land on the word change. That's not to say the previous three years weren't marked by significant shifts in circumstance, but Year Four upped the ante to an…
Continue reading ➞ New Thoughts on Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After Four Years of Marriage
A few weeks into the new year, I found out I was being let go from my job. This wasn't the way I thought the year was supposed to go. Our third year of marriage was primed to be "The One Where They Buy a House." In fact, Shannon and I were set to meet…
The guest speaker stands behind the podium. A clear pitcher of water sits on a stool at his side. Our youth group listens with rapt attention. The guest speaker is talking about sex. He invites three boys to the front and tells them to spit into the water pitcher. Like, really spit. To make it…
Continue reading ➞ Dispatches From Purity Culture: How Sexual Shame Overtook a Generation
We tend to fight when we travel. Which is unfortunate, because we really like to travel. I don't know if it's the accumulated stresses of hurtling through the sky in an aluminum tube at 28,000 feet, navigating the wonders of baggage claim, driving in an unfamiliar city, or simply finding a place where my gluten and…
Continue reading ➞ More Thoughts on Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After Two Years of Marriage
It's been a year since I've become one flesh with my wife. We married in a muggy parlor room in a historic home surrounded by friends and family after our wedding venue was flooded by a torrential downpour the day before our wedding. "And the two became one flesh" is one of the Bible's favorite…
Continue reading ➞ Thoughts on Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After a Year of Marriage
It was 'Sex Night' at camp. A month before my freshman semester, I attended an orientation camp designed to 'welcome' me to my university. Overwhelmingly, the staff was made up of sophomore and junior college students. On the second night, they split the girl and guy campers into two separate groups. The format was a…
Continue reading ➞ Men Will Be Boys: The Root of Modern Misogyny
Instrument of Mercy 