Reflections On Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After Five Years of Marriage

The lead-up to our wedding day felt appropriately chaotic. Two days before we were slated to tie the knot, a "once-in-a-century" storm blew in and flooded the quaint forest wedding venue we had chosen to get married at before we were even engaged. The rain fell in thick torrents all day, submerging streets and burying…

New Thoughts on Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After Four Years of Marriage

Moved from Texas to Colorado.Started a new job.Purchased our first home.Global pandemic. If I could sum up our fourth year of marriage in one word, I'd undoubtedly land on the word change. That's not to say the previous three years weren't marked by significant shifts in circumstance, but Year Four upped the ante to an…

Further Thoughts on Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After Three Years of Marriage

A few weeks into the new year, I found out I was being let go from my job. This wasn't the way I thought the year was supposed to go. Our third year of marriage was primed to be "The One Where They Buy a House." In fact, Shannon and I were set to meet…

Dispatches From Purity Culture: How Sexual Shame Overtook a Generation

The guest speaker stands behind the podium. A clear pitcher of water sits on a stool at his side. Our youth group listens with rapt attention. The guest speaker is talking about sex. He invites three boys to the front and tells them to spit into the water pitcher. Like, really spit. To make it…

More Thoughts on Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After Two Years of Marriage

We tend to fight when we travel. Which is unfortunate, because we really like to travel. I don't know if it's the accumulated stresses of hurtling through the sky in an aluminum tube at 28,000 feet, navigating the wonders of baggage claim, driving in an unfamiliar city, or simply finding a place where my gluten and…

Thoughts on Sex, Vulnerability, and Spirituality After a Year of Marriage

It's been a year since I've become one flesh with my wife. We married in a muggy parlor room in a historic home surrounded by friends and family after our wedding venue was flooded by a torrential downpour the day before our wedding. "And the two became one flesh" is one of the Bible's favorite…